Should we suspend our disbelief...

or do we have a choice


As I sit here at 5am listening to John Mayer's battle studies (on repeat), I think about his effect on us. Not just his impact, but other people of influential status. I'm sitting here feeling utterly miserable because I know that I will never form a relationship with Mr. Mayer, and yet his music influences me to need him. I have already formed a relationship with him and his music (In my mind, but obviously its not mutual. Is this healthy? He is giving me an intimate piece of himself, but its not real. He has expressed himself to me through his music but I will never be reciprocate those feelings. It's like a one-sided relationship. It never works out. He gives, we take, we fall, and he continues on, while we pine over these misleading emotions that were not meant for us. Because I know that I will never form a relationship with Mayer, I should be smart enough to know that I shouldn't expect anything from him, but that is what a great artist does. They can make you think that this song is for you and only you, they can make you fall in love, they can inspire you. It's your job to make us love you. Is this ability a gift or a curse? Should I cherish this trance that I am in over your music, your art, or should I be hurt because I cannot find an outlet to express these emotions. I am under music's spell...I have unwillingly and successfully suspended my disbelief.


::edit:: 9/29/2011


^^whoa, clearly I was obsessed with John Mayer's battle studies album. 

Chow Hon Lam

Here are some pieces from


The Chow Hon Lam Portfolio

I enjoy these

they make me chuckle

I'm about to take my face off

well take my piercings out

this flick is old (I lost that necklace at lollapalooza 2009 =[)

but the reasons for this

1. I chipped my tooth on my lip ring (small chip but it hurt)
2. I see so many people with lip rings
3. I have to keep taking it out for business things
4. Its hard to blow my nose
5. I need something new...

I'm kind of over it...

should I? what do you guys think?

its been a while

"Since I could hold my head up high"

I like that song

but yea its been a while since I last posted so lets start today off with a little "inglourious basterds" (the movie) lost art.

I saw this movie by myself while I was in lundie and it was pretty good. A very dark somewhat humorous vengeance holocaust movie. If you saw it you probably can really appreciate this art..what am I talking about? Even if you didn't see it, you can still appreciate it

These are very graphic pictures..pretty cool though

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2Nhlmc/omgposters.com/2010/02/17/the-lost-art-of-inglourious-basterds/

back in atlanta

So I'm back in atlanta
Last time I blogged I was in london...then I went home to new jersey...and now I'm back at school in the A (I always wanted to say that!)
Me and my new roommate Tiana have finally found a good apartment to live in! I'm so excited, this is my first place.

So let me update you on a few things:
1. I'm skint
2. I haven't been shopping since September of 2009
3. I am going through terrible withdrawals^^
4. I am really excited to rekindle old relationship with friends (I've been gone for awhile)
5. I want to join the peace corps.
6. I really want to build upon my style and continue to grow.
7. I still yearn to be a doctor.


I think that's all right now..I know, weak first blog entry since my absence but hey,you get what you pay for lol.


love you all, my imaginary followers -]


stay tuned